tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5620431287674527501.post2215444844826056576..comments2023-07-08T02:39:59.762-07:00Comments on Confessions Of A Tango Dancer: 3 Reasons Why I Won't Ask A Woman To DanceMark Andersenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03624215008409343913noreply@blogger.comBlogger2125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5620431287674527501.post-69889597523300620022008-03-22T00:01:00.000-07:002008-03-22T00:01:00.000-07:00I'm so happy to hear you like this blog & I hope y...I'm so happy to hear you like this blog & I hope you keep posting comments--you add a lot by doing so. I apologize for not responding sooner, but I've been traveling the past 2 weeks & am playing catch-up. <BR/><BR/>But regarding your experience at the tango festival of sitting most of the time--I'm so sorry to hear that. I completely agree with you that being a beginner is difficult--it took me months before I developed a group of friends (my tango posse) that I can always count on for dances.<BR/><BR/>As a generalization for men (myself included), we don't ask enough strangers to dance. It's definitely something all men should make a point of improving.<BR/><BR/>And please don't take my next comment as an excuse--it's an explanation. When I go to a milonga here's the women I usually dance with (more or less in this order):<BR/><BR/>1. My closest tango friends<BR/>2. My broader tango friends<BR/>3. Women I know from classes<BR/>4. Women I've met at milongas & who have personalities or styles I really like<BR/>5. Women that ask me to dance<BR/>6. Women that approach me & strike up a conversation, but don't ask me to dance<BR/>7. Woman I don't know, but who look like they want to dance (i.e., she's close to the dance floor, looks into it, is swaying to the music...)<BR/><BR/>So, by the time I've danced with women in #1-#6, the milonga is practically over before I can have the opportunity to dance with women I don't know. I'm sure that sounds lame in some ways, but it's the truth. <BR/><BR/>But I'm going to make a point of asking more strangers to dance and I encourage other men to do the same. Actually, if you feel comfortable doing so, you might want to ask more men to dance. Obviously, it's not the norm in Buenos Aires, but it's common in America.<BR/><BR/>And, lastly, I don't know if you're in the Bay area or if you know me. But if you do, I'd love to dance with you, so please ask me next time you see me. In my entire life I've never turned down an invitation to tango and I never will.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5620431287674527501.post-8579171076023510922008-03-16T15:38:00.000-07:002008-03-16T15:38:00.000-07:00I just discovered this blog and I'm so interested ...I just discovered this blog and I'm so interested that I'll keep reading for a while.<BR/><BR/>However, I just want to respond to this post, mostly because I'll stay Anonymous. I'll just say what I need to say and maybe you'll follow up.<BR/><BR/>I just went to my first tango festival. I'm a new tango dancer, but with over 25 years of professional stage/movement/yoga experience. I know my body. Do I volcada? Not yet. Do I ocho/gancho/giro/etc? You bet. This was also my first milonga.<BR/><BR/>What did I do, most of the time? I sat. I was a head and clavicle, from all someone could see of me. How would they know if I was beginner or not? The people who asked me to dance were the people in previous classes, and we enjoyed ourselves.<BR/><BR/>The only strangers who asked me to dance were when I struck up a conversation about something else: I talked with one man about his camera, until he said, "Hey, would you like to dance?" So in this way I only stuck out from the crowd for that one moment simply by being human...?<BR/><BR/>Here's my thought: <BR/><BR/>Being a beginner is very difficult. Being a follower forced to dance with beginner leads is truly terrible. Some are mean, some pick on lesser dancers, and some don't realize how beginner they themselves really are. A bad, cruel lead can set a beginning dancer back - however, a GREAT partner can invigorate the entire learning process.<BR/><BR/>Good leaders can create a whole flock of great followers if they just tried. Class is different than milonga or practica - the only way to get better at milonga is to dance milonga with dancers who make US better. <BR/><BR/>We only need people who are willing to give us a try. We'll get better and then everyone will soon have a good time - with better dancers everywhere, not just judged by who has the prettier shoes, or has run away to BA to become a tango addict.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com